From The Editor
Quit Using the "D" Word
As my wife and I ate dinner last week to celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary, both of our hearts were breaking for my brother. After 22 years of marriage, he just let us know that his wife is filing for divorce. They are both good people - pastors, in fact. And what we’ve learned about divorce is that it is no respecter of persons.
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Two other couple friends of ours are on the verge of separation. And in
the 15 years that we've been married, my wife and I can count 9 other couple
friends of ours who have thrown in the towel. With all these couples, the
situations and circumstances are different, but the result is the same: divorce.
Maybe your marriage is strong - or maybe you feel like your marriage is on the brink of disaster. Either way, our cover story this month provides you with some alternatives to calling it quits. All throughout this issue, in fact, you find tips and sound advice to avoid divorce.
I want to pass something on to you that has been foundational for my marriage. When we went through pre-marital counseling 16 years ago, our pastor told us to never use the "D" word when we fight or argue (the "D" word being divorce, of course).
So many couples bring up the "D" word during the heat of an argument, and it's something that we vowed to never use. My wife has used the word murder, but never divorce (lol).
Because we made a covenant and a vow to be married and stay married, we have the mindset that divorce is not an option. Don't let it be an option for you, either. Make a commitment with your spouse to not bring up the "D" word during your verbal battles.
If you're in an abusive relationship or live with a spouse that is a cheat, your circumstances (for your health and the health of your children) may require you to get out of the situation and seek help. But in most of our experiences, marriages start going south for other reasons. You stop communicating, you allow misunderstandings to go unresolved, you don't forgive quickly for offenses, your partner doesn't feel valued, one or both of you feel taken for granted, and the end result is that your love grows cold if not stale.
Allow this issue of GNT to open up lines of communication between you and your partner. The articles we present are designed to help you build a stronger and healthier marriage and family.
Editor,
Good News Tucson Magazine
© 2008 Good News Tucson™
